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GORILLA AND ED

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Bigdaddy0381 View Drop Down
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    Posted: August/10/2009 at 13:43


A small zoo in Arkansas obtained a very rare species of gorilla.

Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became very difficult to handle. Upon examination, the veterinarian determined the problem. The gorilla was in heat. To make matters worse, there was no male gorilla available.

Thinking about their problem, the Zoo Keeper thought of ed, a redneck part-time worker responsible for cleaning the turtle cages. ED, like most rednecks, had little sense but possessed ample ability to satisfy a female of any species.

The Zoo Keeper thought they might have a solution. ED was approached with a proposition. Would he be willing to mate with the gorilla for $500.00?

ED showed some interest, but said he would have to think the matter over carefully.
The following day, he announced that he would accept their offer, but only under five conditions:

"First", ED said, "I ain't gonna kiss her on the lips." The Keeper quickly agreed to this condition.

"Second", he said, "She must wear a 'Dale Earnhardt Forever' T-Shirt." The keeper again readily agreed to this condition.

"Third", he said, "You can't never tell no one about this." The keeper again readily agreed to this condition.

"Fourth", ED said, "I want all the children raised Southern Baptist." Once again it was agreed.

"And last,"ED said, "I'll need another week to come up with the $500.00."
P&Z Firearms , Pro gun cleanings and gun repair and wood refinishing.

Ecclesiastes 10:2
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Kickboxer View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kickboxer Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: August/10/2009 at 13:50
Opinion,untempered by fact,is ignorance.

There are some who do not fear death... for they are more afraid of not really living
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Ed Connelly View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ed Connelly Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: August/10/2009 at 18:17
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THE ED SHOW

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Steelbenz Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: August/10/2009 at 21:23
I said No Ed, you can't barrow $500 till payday. 
"Don't argue with a fool! From a distance you can't really tell who's who!"
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Sgt. D Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: August/11/2009 at 09:04
Take care of Soldiers, Show em how its done and do it with em, Run to the Fight & and hold your ground! I die my men go home! If you're a NCO and this ain't you. GET OUT! GOD BLESS AMERICA!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ed Connelly Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: August/11/2009 at 20:22
Be sure to visit,

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote BeltFed Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: August/12/2009 at 12:15
+1
Life's concerns should be about the 120lb pack your trying to get to the top of the mountain, and not the rock in your boot.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote SD Dog Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: August/12/2009 at 15:02
Chair Hit
If nobody ever said anything unless he knew what he was talking about, a ghastly hush would descend upon the earth. AP Herbert

Stupidity & ignorance have been the foundation for many certainties.
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